Weight Loss Mindset 5: Believe You Can, Stick To It & Refresh Daily

Weight Loss Mindset 5: Believe You Can, Stick To It & Refresh Daily

Weight Loss Mindset 4: Starting On The Right Foot

Friday, June 19th, 2009 at 11:00 am

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There are many decisions that can be successful only when they are made on the backs of other decisions. For example, if you do not decide to eat healthier foods, you will not lose weight.

Your success in quitting the junk and eating better to lose weight will be dependent on your ability to remain focused as you deal with the withdrawal from certain foods you love (like chocolate, bread, dairy).

One of the keys to succeeding is to treat decision-making like building a house. You lay the foundation before you build the walls. Although it is exciting to add the final touches – decoration – they can be completed only when the rest of the house is finished.

We would all love the blessings of freedom from bad habits, bad food choices, irritating compulsions to eat, and bingeing but first we must lay the foundation.

ACTIVITY 1

Make a list of things you would like to change: decisions when it comes to your eating habits. You could also add to the list exercise if it is something you have always struggled with.

E.g.

I want to quit drinking coffee.

I want to eat more raw foods.

I want to eat more fruit and veg I want to eat less junk.

I want to cut out salt

I want to cut out chips/crisps.

I want to stop drinking coke/pop.

Try to be specific. It may be best to pick things that are affecting you quite obviously or that is obvious to you excessive or lacking.

Bundling Your Decisions

Often, one large decision will involve many smaller but equally important decisions. Let’s look at an example. Say you are trying to get over a sugar addiction. You can’t keep away from your sweets to save your life! This may involve your decision to stay away from donut shops and other places where temptation rears its ugly head. It also may mean avoiding situations that are stressful because stress is another factor that can lead you to your sweet treats.

You may therefore need to make a list of hot places and avoid them for a certain period of time until you are confident you can resist their temptations. Often failure of a large battle is as a result of the small battles, which we all face throughout the day. Making a hard decision is very stressful too. When you feel like you are one step away from failing, decide right then and there to get alone and recharge.

ACTIVITY 2

Take the list that you made in activity 3 and pick 1 decision to tackle first and focus on. Some decisions may be linked, for example if you are a big sweet lover and want to combat you sugar addiction, consuming more fruits and greens will help with those cravings and thus be another good decision to work on as well (if you have written in your decisions you want to eat more fruit/veg).

Take your decision and write down ways in which you can overcome it. Including places you may need to avoid, going to the store on a full stomach and anything else that you know trigger your addictions.

Tackle one area of weakness in your life at a time and examine all the patterns of your lifestyle to do with that area. Focus all of your energy to overcoming that area by writing down a list of changes that have to be made in order for you to win the battle.

If you try to tackle too many large decisions at the same time you will become overwhelmed and most likely fail at them all. You have to choose your decisions wisely and ones that will compliment one another and strengthen your resolve.

NOTE If you find this hard, spend the rest of the day and tomorrow with more self awareness. Take the decision you wish to tackle and just be aware of it throughout the day, for example with sugar addiction – be aware to acknowledge triggers and habits you may have surrounding it and also how it makes you feel. Then come back and you will be better prepared to tackle this activity.

The next points to consider, and that will be considered in the next few posts, are going to evolve around disciplines that will become the foundation of all the decisions you will make and are important in ensuring you stay on track!

Weight Loss Mindset 1: Making The Decision To Change

Weight Loss Mindset 5: Believe You Can, Stick To It & Refresh Daily

Weight Loss Mindset 3: Figuring Out The Why

Wednesday, June 17th, 2009 at 5:56 pm

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In Part 2 I talked about being being honest with yourself. I think many people fool themselves into a false sense of honesty and this is something that we must address if we want to feel better about ourselves and also to achieve our goals. In Part 3 I just want to get you to think about exactly why you want to lose weight and what you

It is easy to make decisions in the heat of guilt (you just gave into a large slice of chocolate cake drizzled in cream and vow never to do so again!) but remorse is a poor base for decision. Emotions change like the wind and we soon forget the guilt we felt for eating what we shouldn’t and do the same thing again.

This is why deciding to go on a diet after a binge is destined to failure. Guilt can be a great motivation but it doesn’t last and it becomes a vicious circle. So what you really need to do is delve deep down inside and get your TRUE motivators for wanting to lose weight, give up chocolate etc. Knowing the real reasons for your decision and not quick guilt will help you stay on track and firmly.

ACTIVITY

Ask yourself why do you want to go on a diet? If for simply losing weight or purging your soul of guilt, it will have no staying power. Desiring to be thin and attractive is a form of vanity. Gaining control over what you eat is important, but in order to gain control your desire must be more than looking like all those skinny celebrities. It not only must be it is! Bingeing is rooted in something far deeper than simply craving.

So sit down and take the time to delve inside. Write down all the reasons you can think of. This can be hard for people. To face inwards and find the real motivation for losing weight – the roots to bingeing and overeating. Is it rooted in fear, insecurity, low self-esteem or simply lack of control? Whatever the root cause(s) there are decisions that need to be made before you begin to make changes in your diet. Very few invest the time and energy to seriously get down to business when it comes to addiction (cravings – please see my book Combat Your Cravings for an explanation as to why cravings are considered addictions) and compulsive behavior. All of us experience certain levels of compulsive behavior but it is worth going deep and rooting out the reasons why we are manifesting unhealthy behavior in our daily living.

Yes, as stated, this can be hard for people because it is often quite painful but it is necessary to make informed choices about the diet you wish to follow and stick to.

So take the time, write a list.

The decision that you make today will affect you for years to come. To deal with compulsive eating or any craving and addiction will force you to face painful things inside your heart and they will rise up in power if they are disturbed through decision. This is why it is important to get a clear image of what you want and why exactly you want and need it.

Weight Loss Mindset 1: Making The Decision To Change

Weight Loss Mindset 5: Believe You Can, Stick To It & Refresh Daily

Weight Loss Mindset 2: Being Honest With Yourself

Monday, June 15th, 2009 at 11:08 pm

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So in Weight Loss Mindset Part 1 I talked about making the decision to change, when it comes to weight loss or cravings. Hopefully you took the time to observe yourself throughout the day to see what you are actually eating, whether you are making conscious decisions in what you choose to eat and what triggers cravings for food (whether emotional or simply because you haven’t been eating enough).

You may find the activity in Part 1 quite an eye opener. You may not have realized how often you use food to comfort you emotionally or may not have realized how often you just simply eat/snack. Before we can take this any further though I think it is important to address some of the issues that can stop us being successful in our decision-making. Then I will come back to how we can progress further we our new found knowledge.

Part 2:

Before you can begin to even think about decision-making, you have to be honest with yourself. Most people trying to lose weight or combat a craving say they struggle. The number one phrase I hear from people trying to lose weight or give up something they love (like chocolate) is “I’m struggling”.

It would be refreshing to hear someone say “I’m lazy, I’ve compromised, and I’m blowing it”. You can move forward from here (I am not saying it isn’t hard to change or that you won’t struggle, but usually when people say they are struggling it is an excuse to indulge more so than a honest expression of what is happening to them).

You don’t have to feel guilty for the way you are, or to beat yourself up for not being better. It is about being true to you. Yes, you can have regrets – repenting can be one of the most powerful forms of decision, but to beat yourself up can be just as detrimental to your progress as can lying.

For example, most people who are overweight are compulsive eaters (even thinner people can be this way – I know some very skinny people who can’t give up their chocolate addiction). Now if you were to ask them or even yourself (because you most likely are if you are reading this) whether you desire to eat a chocolate bar a day for the rest of your life, you would probably answer of course not. However, if I was to ask you if you wanted to be free from food addiction, filled with spirit and contentment and joy you would probably answer yes – it is your heart’s desire. It is a desire that lives constantly inside you, even during the most painful times of indulgence. It is there but for most remains there. A desire never fulfilled due to the clutches of addiction and craving and feeling fat.

Of course, it would be false of me to say that you wouldn’t want to eat a chocolate bar. But you don’t always hunger after junk food either do you?

The temptation for the compulsive eater comes like a powerful tornado – it whips you up into a whirlwind of emotion and inspires an imagination of pleasure. These storms have triggers. These triggers are usually something like hurtful words from a spouse, feelings of depression or insecurity or of not being in control, a bad day at the office etc. I could list books worth. You become seduced by the food for its comfort and once you have fulfilled that feeling, that feeling is soon swept away and met with guilt and despair. As a result we often tell ourselves we will be stronger next time.

Many health food “gurus” or diet systems will tell you that it is perfectly ok to compromise – indulge now and then. But compromising between the two desires of the heart is not the answer.

So how can I be successful in making a decision and seeing it through? See Part 3…

Weight Loss Mindset 1: Making The Decision To Change

Weight Loss Mindset 5: Believe You Can, Stick To It & Refresh Daily

Weight Loss Mindset 1: Making The Decision To Change

Wednesday, June 10th, 2009 at 11:45 pm

Comments (137)

I have decided to put a little series together about the weight loss mindset and how to overcome some of the difficulties that we face including sticking to decisions and being honest with ourselves. If anything I hope that you will find these posts useful in your own pursuits in regards to weight loss or craving control.

I will be adding activities within my posts to help you think more critically about what could be holding you back or where you can start in freeing yourself from a lifetime of habits and weight issues. These activities are things I have used to help myself overcome many of my food cravings that have held me back on my path to a healthier existance and without them I don’t think I would have progressed as far as I have so far.

So here goes for the first part…

Where is that moment, that defining moment, when we rise above those outside influences and develop our own individuality – the moment of decision? When is that moment when we choose to do what we know deep down is right and best for ourselves? Do we need to reach the brink of explosion? Do we need to push ourselves over the edge in order to get there? Sometimes. But that doesn’t mean it’s a bad thing, it can be the start of something wonderful.

There are powerful influences clamouring for that place inside of you that makes choices, whether they are your eating habits, shopping habits or even your faith. We can make decisions that are easy, that follow the norm and we can make decisions that are painful, that are downright difficult and even isolate us from the world around us, for a while (or so it can seem).

Eating is ingrained in our culture as a social thing. We celebrate birthdays, thanksgiving, Christmas with a delicious table full of different foods. We get together with friends over lunch or dinner. It is familiar to get stuck to what our society does and can be difficult to let go of when we want to change our ways and live a healthier lifestyle despite what the rest of the world wants to do and wants us to do.

Losing weight is a step towards a healthier lifestyle that can be met with pessimism from others who want you to remain in their world of obesity and cakes. It can be what breaks you and convinces you back into habits you are desperate to leave behind.

But at the end of the day, it is our decision to make.

We can either continue to follow the herd and fool ourselves into happiness or we can break free and make the changes we have always wanted to make.

Decision-making has creative power. Decisions have their own inaction that can build in momentum. Many people have dreamt of what they want to do and made it happen. The world is full of dreamers, but it is only those who act on their dreams who get to where they want.

ACTIVITY

Take a moment to look at your own life, your daily living.

How much of your daily living reflects thoughtfulness, decisiveness and how much is simply playing out habits and unconscious behavioral patterns that have nothing to do with decisions?

For an example let’s take smoking. You are simply acting out of habit and aren’t really making a decision every time you light up. So consider your options, how it affects your health and whether it is really a good choice to smoke. You may have made the decision to smoke many years ago, where you forced your body to accept the inhalation of toxic carbon. Once the body had conditioned its homeostasis into accepting the cigarettes you could do it unconsciously, like breathing.

Write down all your patterns and habits in relation to food and eating.

Do you eat mindfully?

Do you rush out and gulp down a drink before leaving?

Do you eat out of boredom (mindlessly)?

Do you listen to your hunger signals?

Do you know when you are hungry as opposed to craving?

Can you remember what you have eaten on anyone day?

Can you remember if you had any snacks?

When you have tried to diet before have you been aware of your eating habits or has some of it slipped under the radar?

NOTE: If you find this hard, spend the rest of the day and tomorrow with more self awareness and try to notice and note mentally the things you do in terms of eating/snacking and emotionally then come back to this activity

So much of daily life ends up like this – devoid of decisions. That isn’t such a bad thing if our history had been built on good choices, but if not we must stop and dismantle the destructive decisions and any patterns that dictate unconscious behavior and create new healthy decisions. This is crucial in our weight loss endeavors but in literally every aspect of life.

This can be extremely tough at first, because we are so used to being carried along in a culture that has made nearly every decision for us – have you ever stood back and questioned whether your society’s decision making really works in favor of you?

All of us at some point have moaned about the many decisions that have been made for us or moaned about our weight or our living conditions etc. But what have we done about it?

What have you done about it?

Instead of moaning and praying that things will work out it is time to believe in yourself and the decisions you want for yourself and act.

You have all you need in order to change.

Weight Loss Mindset 1: Making The Decision To Change